Butterflies

 

Butterflies of preciousness
Just woken up in openess

Fly so gently through thin air
On their way to no man’s land

Landing there in silent places
Of the open wounded heart

Working, still in loving comfort
Healing wounds that were not there

And return to distant farness
With a fragment of our hearts …

Blessing

 

Precious newborn child of God
On your journey to who knows where?
Unaware of Love surrounding
Unaware of all the pain

Walk hand in hand with stillness
To the fullness in your heart
Walk hand in hand with dearness
To the love inside your heart

Find your own amazing freedom
That lies waiting in your soul
Dive into the endless oceans
Where you always find yourself

Blessings on your journeys
Without distance, without goal
Blessing on returning
Home where you have never left

Thousand

 

Dying thousand deaths
Fearing everything

And on a beautiful morning
In the silent dew on the grass

Me greeted me for the first time
and I knew at once Who she was …

Forest

 

Walking through the dripping forest, abandonned by people, I walked my way. Raindrops on my hair, silent noice of rain falling upon the leaves, putting one foot in front of the other and some old friends payed me a visit.

The forestpath was filled with thoughts, old familiar thoughts, from long ago, my old familiar friends.

 ”I am not good enough”, kissed me tenderly and disappeared into the rain.
“It is not there for me”, came  to me, with hesitation, looked at me, a little shy and dissolved in the wind.
“Nobody loves me”, looked at me, so penetrative, lovingly; she was with me for so many years. It was hard for her to go. Slowly she turned around, looked upon me for the last time and merged with the air.

I stood and saw them go, tears in my eyes. They were so familiar to me; they had given me so much. It was time for them to go. Silence came upon me. I put down my backpack and sat on the moss. One by one they passed, the people who helped me say goodbye to these old friends. Deep gratitude came over me for them, who helped me and still do.

At home, dry clothes, tea, woodstove on, I still feel the gentleness of the rain, the forestpath and the forest. The forest that is my home, that cherishes me, gives me my answers. The forest that is there, unmovable. The forest that I am.

Freedom

 

When you are freed from the identification with your past, your past will leave you alone

When you are freed from the identification with your thoughts, your thoughts leave you alone

When you are freed from your identification with your emotions, your emotions leave you alone

When you are freed from your identification with you, you leave You alone.

Obstacle

 

Once you are on the slide to the depth in you, sometimes you experience some stopping in the glide. And you call it an obstacle. A bump, a ditch, a detour, a flat tire, a worn out shoe: very obvious.

There are also other obstacles: concotions, ghosts haunting from the past, fears of what lies ahead, attachment to the old and well known, attachment to the old pain, the old patterns: invisible most of the time.

Most of the time the invisible obstacles are nasty ones. You don’t know that they are there, until you feel inside yourself that there’s something not right.

And then it seems you have a choice: return and go the familiar road again, or, with soft hands opening the gift of it, look at it, embrace it and let it go back to where it came from.

You don’t know what you will choose when the time has come. The secret is that you don’t have to choose. It chooses you. The obstacle chooses you and the solution chooses you.

And sometimes there is someone with you, arms wide open, lovingly, who is there while you work your way through the obstacle.
Some people call it an angel
Maybe so
Maybe you are the angel
In the form of a human

Conditions

 

I can not relate to you on your conditions
I can only relate to you on my conditions

and the truth is
I don’t have any conditions.

Agnus Dei

Agnus Dei
qui tollis peccata mundi
miserere nobis

could also mean:

Innocent Light in me
that is hidden
under the burden
of my unconsciousness conditioning
bring me Home

Receiving

 

 Brought up with:
“It is better to give than to receive”

Made numb with
“It’s not there for me”

Fighting pain
of unfull-filled desire:
Giving is so much safer than receiving

Later learning
to open your hands
Experiencing slowly
the joy of fullness

Receiving is giving
Giving is receiving.

Enough

 

 Come sit in the grass
All your pain, it is enough

Listen to the wind, the trees
Listen to your silent voice

Come with all your fears and sorrows
Little precious child of God

Take one step and then another
On the path that is not there
To the non existing goal

And come home from worried pasts
In the not existing now …